Monthly Archives: January 2009
My name is Bella Noche and I am an awesome dog, if I do say so, myself, and I do. I think, but am not totally sure, that I am a mixture of Black Lab and Rhodesian Ridgeback, hey, I’m not a vet! I have a cool ridge down my back, big floppy ears, and really shiny black fur.
I looove to go to the Green Belt, and hike, play with whiffle ball. I am 100% puppy! Yeah! And yeah. I have buckets of energy, and I don’t often realize how big I am, and that I am still growing so I often run into people or things accidentally. Oops! I am a tad clumsy, but gimme time and I will grow into my body, and watch out! My charm more than makes up for it. ching!
I have a loving personality, and I adore snuggling, and using your pillow. I am still in a bit of a chewing stage, but if you spend time with me, and get me things that I am supposed to chew on, I will spare your tennies.
I am looking for a lifelong companion. I know what you are thinking, online? But hey, it worked for some of my friends, so I thought I’d give it a try.
What I desire in a lifelong companion: Long walks, hikes, a bed big enough for two-hey, hey, someone to have dinner with, maybe watch some TV, I am pretty open, so long as we are hanging, because I want to hang with you and that makes everything else, infinitely better.
I have decided to not have children of my own, and focus on my career instead, so the kind person who found me, has made me an appointment at the ‘family planning’ clinic on Tuesday. I will have my Rabies vaccination and the operation, but my rescuer is very financially strapped, or else I would keep her, so I will need someone who might could lend me some cash to get what else I need. Don’t worry, I’m good for it. I will repay you with joy, unconditional love, soft fur to pet, endless hours of enjoyment, and loyalty like you never saw. Hey, you might end up owing me! Ha!
I wish I could stay with my ‘secretary’ who is typing this for me, but she is basically homeless too, and is working to find me shelter and a good home even though she doesn’t have one herself. I think she loves me very much, and would like to continue in my employ, but is unable to. I appreciate her efforts, but need something long term.
I like roadtrips. I haven’t been camping, but I know I will love it. Take me! I would even go to Vegas, so long as what happens there, stays there.
If you think you might be interested in the position, please contact my secretary and we will arrange a meeting to see if you are THE ONE.
I am picky. I want a yard, and a promise to go hiking as much as possible. In return, I will be the best friend you ever had.
I can’t wait to meet you. Have a great day.
Do you like cookies? I like cookies. I like cookies with a big tall glass of ice cold milk. If you get 2% or Skim, the milk gets really cold, even colder if you put a pint glass in the freezer before hand.
I love to get the milk ready, twist the cookie apart, lick the inside, and put it back together, put it in my mouth and take a big gulp of nice, ice cold milk. Are you with me?
Imagine that you have been waiting all week. Its Friday, you have toiled at a thankless job, fought traffic, paid bills and on your way home you think, man, milk and cookies, yeah, that would be grand. By the time you pull into your drive, your mouth is watering, your mind is reeling, this is gonna be the best cookie and milk ever. You race to the kitchen. Pull your frosty mug from the freezer, pour the milk, eat the cookie, and slam the milk…
to find that it is three weeks old and curdled, making a sour, bitter, cottage-y cake of flour, sugar and chunky milk in your mouth.
That is how Fran Bolter makes me feel.
I can spit *patooie* all I want, but she leaves a bad taste in my brain.
Fran Bolter is a hack. A very sad, pathetic woman, who’s desperate need for attention drives her to misrepresent herself as an intellect, when all she really is, is the lonely, pimpled face dork who was ridiculed in grade school, and mocked by the boys on the football team, she so despairingly longed to be with in eleventh grade.
The woman has obvious esteem issues. What kind of “philosopher” poses as an intellect in leotards? Socrates? No, but he kinda wore a dress toga, but I digress.
Quelle pathetique et triste!
It is should be obvious, to any rational person, that Ms. Bolter has made a living off of playing the devil’s advocate, (poorly, even) and is indeed, a shallow, attention seeking loser. Do you hear the crap that comes out of your mouth Ms. Bolter? And you have this air of superiority, when you are in fact, just a celebutart. I am most offended at how you make “educated” women seem, and how you disgracefully pander to psuedo-intellectuals, while wearing a tank top. (As my dad would say–You’ve got a lot of class lady, its all low, but honey, you got it.)
So, I am sorry that you were shunned in high school. Get over it. But for the love of philosophy, shut your ignorant mouth, you are distracting, and annoying. The more you talk, the less we get done. You set, not only women, but men as well, back thousands of years, maybe millions. The one brain cell you use to stir the bullshit you do, is diminishing our species back to the usefulness of an amoeba. No offense to the amoeba, por supuesto, but amoebas lack the capacity to ponder profundities, and unify to save humanity. Which is what we should be doing, instead of putting out the fires of the ignorant, or in your case, setting them.
Only creating controversy is useless. Is it that you can find no way to be productive? Is that why you sit around and try to divide people? I mean, other than your unquenchable need for attention. Why else would you allow that foul, sorry excuse for logical reasoning flow from your untempered and nauseating clap trap? I want to believe that you are not as stupid as you seem. It is much more comforting to believe that you are trying to be clever, and just manipulating attention for yourself, no matter how pathetic that seems, it is still better than imagining that you actually believe the ridiculous, manufactured and manipulated factoids you base your writing on. Go on girl, spin it how you like. In the end, everyone will see, that you don’t believe, you just crave. Are you a middle child? They are the ones who usually act out like this. Just something to think about. You are an embarrassment to any thinking individual. And anyone who works in the circus or anyone who wears leotards.
So, please, I beg you. Shut your ignorant mouth, and go dance on a pole or something, like all the other girls with low self esteem.
You already have the attire, as I have seen all your book covers. Sale on unitards, aisle 5. Blue light baby, blue light.