letting go, work in progress

I have spent a great deal of my time being frustrated and angry lately at the world, at my periphery, and lastly but greatest with myself.

All anger leads back to home eventually, doesn’t it? Yes, it does, and I realize this even if, I have yet, realized how to dispense with it. But I feel very close, close to letting go, forever. A death of the self, a release of the illusion. The Self is slipping away.

After all, I am not angry at Chinese people on behalf of Tibet, I am exasperated with the karma of oppression.  I am not mad at my friend because she is lazy, I am agitated that laziness exists.  I am not angry with myself because I do not try to remain attached, because I most certainly do, I am angry because attachment, is.

I struggle, like everyone.

With the Lunar New Year upon us, I find myself, for what that is worth, at the end of my third cycle.  It has created a shift, like Tectonic Plates, a collision of two moments, the past and the present, manifesting a new path which is the future.  It is more than just the moments day to day. This feels 12 years coming. I am exhausted, but ready.  I have discovered the source of perpetuation.  Now, I shall live forever, if I choose.

I am let go.

I have never meant to destroy any Thing, but the illusion. At times I am a typhonic tornadocane, at others, a small trickle capable of carving the Grand Canyon.  The pressure creates friction and at once, mountains are made, valleys are carved, and deep crevasses collect oceans of rain.  Siva. Krisna.  Special nod to the one and only Lord Vimilakirti.  And with most respect, The Bhagavad Gita, it is essential for everyman.

It is with great love, always.



About Janis Alanis

Thinker, BS detector, champion of Reason. Unafraid. Ticked off, and riled up. View all posts by Janis Alanis

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